Author(s): Araya Mengistu
This might be simply answered as yes/true or no/false. Let us see some historical scenario about husband and wife life as well as some conflicts
This might be simply answered as yes/true or no/false. Let us see some historical scenario about husband and wife life as well as some conflicts. As it is stated in the holy Bible, the couple life started immediately after creation. Adam created on the sixth day of creation (Genesis 1: 26-27; 2: 6-7). Soon- after a helper named as Eve was created from the rib of Adam (Genesis 2: 21-24). Her creation was with purpose; to support Adam and to be a wife of him (Genesis 2: 22-25). The two individuals started a marriage life and had their sons and daughters, and thereby came as ancestors of the generation. I guess the love affair during their time was not a question. During that time there were plenty of good things in their surroundings and there was no time to think about the evils/ bad. The relationship between family members was so elegant, attractive as well as sweeter. No rubbish dialogue, cheating, or nagging and hating. Through time the human population increase in number resulting in amplified population pressure. Apart from the population pressure, the needs of individuals or groups become extended, and the human population diversified. Human needs as well as interest shifted from communal thinking to private or individualism or group or team oriented at a wider scale, and in most of the cases self-centrism outweighs. I think this concept entered into couple’s life and leads them self-protectionism. When a person is self-centered or fitted/geared to towards selfprotectionism, the realities will be masked and run in most of the cases for self-benefit/s leaving aside the others; they are becoming profit makers at the expense of others. Such ideas definitely lead to conflict and disturb the stable environment.
Once upon a time, I was leading a marital life and my wife was so excellent. During our life, my sister daughter was with us. Besides attending her school, she was assisting our life or daily activities. In some occasions, I was observing some misunderstanding with my sister in-law and as a result there was quarrelling once in the blooms. I tried to interfere and ask both of them to judge and solve the problem as to my level. In the mean time, I was not able to come up with a good or concrete reason why my wife was challenging her. Due to this, I stand towards my sister in-law and discuss the issue/s with my wife. However, we could not reach into consensus rather she judged me as I sided to my sister in-law. In the mean time before things boom I sent my sister in-law to her families. My personal observation also proved that when the husband families live in the house compared to wives families, the peace of the house is a bit different.
In one coffee ceremony occasion with my staff members this issue was raised and most of the participants, even those husbanded argued that wives are not good for their husbands relatives or families. Among those there were two ladies who were grown up with their brothers who were leading a marital life, and both of them gave a witness as to their experience concerning their brothers’ wives behaviors. Both concluded as if wives are not good for their husband families. Contrary to this I had one experience and I shared them. While I was a university student, I spent most of the times with my elder brother and his wife was humble to me and I did not see a negative look to our relatives while they do have a chance to live with them for a short or relatively a longer period of times. Rather she was not as such good to her husband. After listing what I said, few reached into agreement and gave their own justifications, while most of them stood against my experience by giving a variety of reasons. Finally, I winded up the discussion by saying as some of you said that might be exceptional. Yes! There are exceptional occasions and my brother’s wife might be such an exceptional. I do not want to stop at the majorities understanding and want to ask some of the wives as well as the husbands that I know them very well for having a better picture. All gave me the one, which goes in line with others; wives are not good for their husband relative/s.
Still I do have a problem to accept and generalize that “ wives are not good for their husband families/relatives ”. Therefore, I want to share my opinion to readers and get a concrete answer regarding the sentence whether it is TRUE or FALSE. I am interested to read if there are research works regarding the issue. If it holds true, I think this could be seen as a public health challenge since the consequences might lead to divorce and family disintegration. Sociologists or public health professionals may carry out a research and gave us some evidence based reports. Furthermore, they should show us the possible reasons why they are not good ones for their husband families.
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